Godly Insights for the 21st Century Life

 There have been several situations throughout the past few years where a communication breakdown has led to a misunderstanding that has caused hurt feelings or worse. Following those issues, here are a few things that could have been done in those situations to make the conversation go smoother. Apologize early, apologize often:  Early in 2021, there was a remote learning day that I was not aware of until I showed up at work and no one was there. For some reason that school year, calls and text notifications were not going out to all of the employees. I checked, and I had gotten an email, but it had come late enough that I was already getting dressed by the time I had received it. I sent a reply to the notification and the sender apologized and assured me that she had sent out the email as soon as she was told she could. Unsurprisingly, I was not the only person who had shown up at work not realizing we were remote. We received an email later that week from someone else telli...

 "So let go of your plan Be caught by my hand I'll show you what I can do When I dream for you" ~  " Dream for You "-Casting Crowns     I recently became engaged, and even though I absolutely love my fiancee, the experience isn't exactly how I dreamed it would be. I'm older than I thought I would be when I got married, my fiancee's not like what I pictured my future husband would look like, and I met him online instead of in person. However, other aspects are the way I dreamed. We share the same faith and political views, and very quickly developed inside jokes that leave those around us shaking their heads. We have been very good for each other these past seven months, and we get along so well that some people thought we were married long before he even proposed. I fully believe that God knew what he was doing when he brought us together, even if it didn't happen quite the way I imagined.      As I mentioned in some earlier posts , this is not t...

 Okay, my name isn't actually Karen. However, Karen is my mother's name and the name of other important people in my life. Unfortunately, Karen has also become a neganym, a derogatory name for any woman who insists on doing something that the user disagrees with, from refusing to wear a mask to cleaning up a mess left by the user's children . The meme originated because of one man dissing his ex-wife , but it has now morphed into a widespread insult.  In my post Don't Be Like Judas , I mentioned that his worst act was his last one, and that's all he's remembered for now. The same is true of Benedict Arnold, and now these two names are widely used neganyms for anyone who betrays someone else. These neganyms are perfectly acceptable while using Karen as a neganym is not. The first reason is because what Judas and Benedict Arnold did is universally seen as wrong. Almost everyone has felt the sting of betrayal at some point in their life, although for most of us it...

I saw a post earlier this year about choosing your hard. It said: Marriage is hard. Divorce is hard. Choose your hard. Obesity is hard. Being fit is hard. Choose your hard. Being in debt is hard. Being financially disciplined is hard. Choose your hard. Communication is hard. Not communicating is hard. Choose your hard. Life will never be easy. It will always be hard. But we can choose our hard. Pick wisely. I thought the post was good and appreciated the sentiment. Then shortly after I saw this post, I saw another one where these words were crossed out and others were added underneath. They said: Marriage is hard. Staying in an unhappy marriage is harder. Obesity is hard. Because it's stigmatized. Fit is not always accessible to everyone. Being in debt is a complex socio-economic phenomenon often related to privilege. It is not necessarily related to "discipline". Communication is complex. Learning to communicate is a lifelong experience. You don't always get to ...

There's been a post shared on Facebook in the weeks since the Supreme Court struck down Roe v. Wade that starts out by saying: "I'm not pro-murdering babies." However, it then gives various scenarios where abortion should be justified . The implication is that if someone is pro-life, they only care about the babies themselves, not the women who face pregnancies under difficult circumstances. The truth is, we do care about the women in these situations, perhaps even more so than those that are pro-choice. We are willing to help them see that the answer to a crisis pregnancy is assisting them through the crisis, not getting rid of the pregnancy. That's why in my state we are voting on an amendment called Value Them Both because we do value them both and want to make sure that both the woman and child are well cared for throughout the pregnancy and beyond. Here are the arguments in the oft-shared post, and how each hypothetical woman can be cared for without having a...

      Last week, the Supreme Court overturned the controversial 1973 decision in Roe v. Wade. Following the ruling, I saw quite a few posts that said some variation of: "Here's my opinion. If you disagree, please unfriend or unfollow me." Even though I disagreed with some of those posts, I did not unfriend anyone because I know the pain of being unfriended.     As I mentioned in my post Easily Offendable , I was unfriended by two long-term friends back in August because they disagreed with me. While I was initially angry about the situation, and still am to an extent, I'm finding that as time passes my feelings are gradually changing from anger to sadness. We were good friends for 13 years, and we had some fun times together. I was at their engagement party and wedding, I was the only person who showed up when they did the Polar Plunge, and I was ecstatic when they started coming to my church five years ago. Before the pandemic, I took care of their son in the c...

 "My fears would surely kill me If I didn't know the truth The things that I'm afraid of Are afraid of You" ~ " Things That I'm Afraid Of " - Josh Wilson     I had reached a place a couple of years ago where I was more or less fearless, or so I thought. Then the pandemic hit, and while I was never afraid of the virus, I was afraid of what would happen because of the quarantine and separation from others. Unfortunately, some of those fears came true, and having some fears come true has led to new fears feeling even stronger.     Recently, I have been bombarded with a wave of new fears that has threatened to overwhelm me. My car needs expensive repairs, my dad is facing an unfair situation that I can't help him with, and I am in a new relationship, which is wonderful and scary at the same time. In fact, I am posting this much later than I initially wanted to. Those fears were so strong that it was hard for me to put into words how I was feeling, and ev...